Top 5 Albums/EP’s That DONT Suck [SEPTEMBER 2017]

Washer – All Aboard [But it on Amazon!]
Grungy indie punks from Brooklyn mixin’ up a bowl of grooves for us with killer vocals. Really scrappy songs that get stuck in your teeth and stay there, like when you eat ribs and you don’t have a toothpick. This could be my favourite release this month. I mean I associated it with oral hygiene. That’s saying a lot. Everything is solid here. If you don’t eat meat you can compare it to eating a mango off the pit. Like someone just hands you a mango and you have to eat it with your bare hands. No knife. This is the perfect compliment for any band.  Listen on Bandcamp

.

The Fiasco Kerfuffle – Get A Job
This is bedroom emo at it’s emoest, and also it’s bedroomest. This is definitely just a really sad guy sitting on the edge of his bed making brilliant songs that no one will ever hear, other than me, and maybe you, if you go to his page. I really hope you do. So few people have a knack for lyrics like this. The subject matter is self-deprecation at it’s self-deprecationiest, and maybe it gets you a little down, but what’s wrong with being down? I like being down. I feel most comfortable when I’m down. What is this ‘up’ I’ve heard so much about? What’s up!? Down with up! Everything about this works perfectly. It’s a beautiful accident. Even the bad mixing and shitty white-noise just add to the sadness, and thus strengthens these songs.  Listen on Bandcamp

.

El Googly Diablo – ST [Buy it on Amazon!]
They do it in the name of love. They write these beautiful songs for you and me in the name of love, and all that is good. All that is punk, all that is weird. El Googly Diablo is the name of the band. It’s a weird name, and don’t let the spooky cover art fool you. This album is inspirational and uplifting. It’s endearing the way a wet dog is. It’s so cute but its fur is gross right now. Are you going to pet the wet dog anyway? Well? I’ll pet this fucking dog all day. Maybe just like on it’s head though. You know, where it’s still mostly dry.  Listen on Bandcamp

.

Ueckers – 2 Balls 2 Strikes
Anytime there’s a decent Snot-punk album released, it’s automatically in consideration for the top 5, even when all of the songs are about beer league baseball. It doesn’t matter what the songs are about ok, as long as they’re clever, and this is clever stuff. They’ve got the background vocals perfect too. If you’re a grease-punk and you also happen to be on a softball team, I may have just found your favorite album of all time. Don’t be fooled by bands like Modern Baseball or Canadian Softball. Those bands don’t even talk about balls. What kind of deceptive bullshit is that anyway?  Listen on Bandcamp

.

Soapboxer – Lush [Buy it on Amazon!]
Good news from Thunder Bay! Said the headline never. Zzzzing! Seriously though if you’re Canadian you know this town has it’s share of problems, but Soapboxer, for all I know, doesn’t appear to be one of them. If anything they’re a break in the clouds for that truly horrible place. I’m totally kidding. Thunder Bay is fine (if you’re not Native). KIDDING! (kind of). This is shoegazie emo stuff with dreamy vocals and poignant lyrics that make you want to be young again. Unless you’re still young. I don’t know how it makes you feel if you’re still young. Probably a little sad. By the way, this album is choice!  Listen on Bandcamp